I am an eternal & infinite being.
but I spent the majority of my life thinking I was nothing. no one. it didn’t matter how I felt. what I said. what I did. my life was already planned out for me. struggle every day. work to survive. hate yourself. get married. have kids. suffer through the mundane. die with regret.
bleak, I know.
but I know I’m not the only one who thought this, witnessed this, believed this.
we are taught from a young age that we are expected to do x, y, z. the same way our parents did. & their parents did.
men do this.
women do that.
because, someone said so.
we are told that to get anything good in life we have to suffer. that money buys happiness & skinny buys peace. that success is the goal & self love... well it isn’t even part of the conversation.
but deep down we all know this is false. we feel the disconnect. yet we continue to live in a reality created to keep us small. in line. obeying. in fear.
& so we live in a box built for us by those who want nothing more than our work our energy our time.
we live in this box locked on all sides — not knowing that we are the ones who hold the key.
I don’t remember the exact moment I realized I out grew my box — the bitchy judgmental athletic fitness obsessed box. but I came to this realization through journaling. seeing my truth before me on the paper.
I realized that I didn’t just outgrow my old box — but that I didn’t want a new one.
I was done with boxes. with being defined.
so I decided to explore. I got curious. I can’t love myself if I don’t know myself. so, who am I? what do I like? what makes me, me?
I journaled. meditated. leaned into my spirituality. I found ways to express myself — through words through feelings through connection.
& that is how page came to be. this is the most powerful way for me to express myself. my soul my passion my heart my essence.
it’s a day by day discovery. leaning into what makes me feel warm, juicy, excited.
taking aligned action after aligned action.
it’s the curiosity that keeps me free. from society’s expectations. from any god damn box. always growing. always evolving. becoming — me.
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